Parenting is hard!

"Working out what our children need in order to thrive is definitely not simply a matter of knowing the right information about child development and having an armoury of clever techniques (the controlled cry, the ‘naughty step’, the gold-star reward charts, the ‘one-two-three magic’, ad infinitum). A deep and joy-filled connection with our children – the kind of connection that allows us to be a positive influence in their lives – rests on our ability to relate to their innermost feelings, to see more deeply than their surface behaviour. This kind of connection is far more powerful, influential and enriching than authoritarian behaviour-control."  Source

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Last Friday after trying so hard to help my 3 year old clean her room without success and than having an all out tantrum and screaming fest for at least an hour from her...

I had my own little breakdown. 

After I got my wits about me I prayed! Because I know that we have a loving Father in Heaven who hears our prayers. Do you know that?  I hope you do. 

Yesterday I told my all knowing =) older sister of four adorable boys that I felt like Lizzy was out of control lately.  This has been so hard for me because I know without a doubt that a lot of her acting out is my lack of parenting (or just about everything) since becoming pregnant. I have been less patient, less kind, easily annoyed and given a lot less time to her since getting pregnant.  My sister told me that she wished she could give me some really good advice but she really didn't have any.  She was a listening ear though and then later on in the conversation when I told her I felt like I needed to give her more structured activities. She told me she had recently read an article (I just updated this link because it was wrong) about moms who feel they need to do so much structured things and who overwhelm themselves with what they are not doing are actually more depressed moms and that ends up rubbing off on the children.  She then reminded me that what lizzy needs most is just simple time from me doing what lizzy loves. 

She was 100% right and had ended up giving me the advice I needed!
Today I spent some time cleaning but then sat down with her and read her a ton of books.  Then I sat down with her at the table and colored.  Those are her two favorite things right now.  It was so simple and yet I know it meant the world to her and she has been happier today...I can tell! 

My hypnobirthing instructor also sent out a bunch of articles today and one in particular I really liked because I feel like it pertains to my struggles with my daughter right now.  Its titled Intuitive Parenting and you can find it here.  Its a good one.  Go read it.  (The quote at the top of the page comes from it)

What about you?  Did you feel like your children suffered during your pregnancies?  How did you keep your head above water?  What simple things do you enjoy doing with your children that they love?  How do you remind yourself that its all okay?

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Jessica on Juice Feasting-Guest Blogger

A few weeks ago a friend called me and said that she had been watching a documentary about a juice "diet" that could heal people of health problems they were struggling with.  She thought of me because I have struggled with some health problems (another story for another time) for a few years and we can't seem to find any cause for it.  I was intrigued and looked into it but haven't really done anything more then that. 

Right around that time I happened to pop into a friends blog where she mentioned that she was going to start Juice Feasting and she would have a blog for it. 

I met Jessica back in College where we worked in the same office for a year-ish.  I really got into her family blog after we were both married because she is really funny and a really good writer.  Then about the same time I started to get into running she did as well and started a blog about running. I am really excited that she was willing to write up a blog post to inform all of you about her experience with it. 


Without further adieu,

Hey everyone!
I’m so excited to guest blog here and tell you my journey which you can find at www.jessicajuices.blogspot.com.
I first heard about the juice feast last summer, when my sister told me that she was doing one. I remember her saying, “Now, you are going to think I’m crazy but just hear me out.” I thought she was crazy. I mean, we’re talking about not eating anything except for the juices from fruits and veggies for up to 92 days! I was able to watch her journey as she detoxed, lost weight, and felt great. It was all from her example that I thought about trying to do one myself. If it wasn’t for her, I would have never considered something like this before. Plus, I do admit, I was jealous of the weight she was losing!
Back in October, I had decided to complete a juice feast. However, I didn’t want to set myself up for failure over the holidays so I decided to wait until January. It seemed fitting, right when everyone was making their new year’s resolution, I could do mine as well. Then, I found out that I was pregnant which threw juice feasting out the window for another 2 years or so (pregnancy plus breast feeding). This may be taboo to admit but I was mixed between happy and disappointed when I found out that I was pregnant. I felt happy because we would be welcoming a new baby in July but I felt disappointed in myself that I still was 10 lbs. over my pre-pregnancy weight. I didn’t feel good about myself and was guilty that I had gotten pregnant. Then I felt even guiltier because I know that so many women struggle with fertility and would love to have a baby of their own. Then, because I felt guilty, I would comfort myself with food and the vicious cycle continued.

In November, I lost my baby due to an ectopic pregnancy.  It was really devastating and hard but in many ways, I have grown so much from that experience that I didn’t want (nor do I want again) and wouldn’t wish on anyone.

I decided to look into doing the juice feast again. I felt like in order to heal, I needed to take time to myself and really concentrate on getting me healthier. Juice feasting was that way to do that. I decided to do juice feasting for 3 main reasons:

1. Juice feasting heals scars and scarring in the Fallopian tubes can cause you to have an ectopic pregnancy. Because of the surgery from the ectopic pregnancy and from an ovarian cyst surgery I had when Jack was only a newborn, I wanted to heal myself and my reproductive system.

2. I wanted to jump start a new lifestyle of eating whole and raw foods.

3. I wanted to lose weight and look sexy!
When I told my husband about this, he was very supportive of me although the sound of the blender really started to annoy him after a while. I don’t think he knew entirely what I was getting myself into because juice feasting is a tad expensive and seeing as we are college students, there wasn’t a whole lot left in the budget for this. When you juice feast, you’re supposed to use all organic produce but being here in Rexburg, Idaho, finding enough organic produce is very difficult. However, it is still acceptable to use non-organic produce as well. In the end, it was about $10 a day to eat.
I talked earlier about how the juice feast was to help heal scarring. The purpose of the juice feast is to heal overall. Think about this: every single food ingredient that we put into our body leaves either through sweat, tears, or waste. Does the amount of food you put into your body equal what comes out? The average person has about 5-25 lbs of waste (AKA poop) in their system. Wowza!
This is the purpose of a juice feast. To cleanse out all of the waste that in your system and I’m not just talking about solids. Certain foods are digested a certain way which can result in production of acid.


Your body doesn’t like acid very much and without natural buffers, you would die. The more acid-producing food you put into your body, the harder your digestive system has to work to neutralize it. When you juice feast, it gives your digestive system a chance to relax so that your body can concentrate on healing other areas that need attention.

After 8 days of eating pure, blended juice, I decided that it was time to stop and start my new lifestyle. It has been about 3 weeks since I ended my juice feast but I still juice for breakfast. I think of it like a homemade V8 juice and I feel great knowing that I’ve gotten in all of my veggies for the day. For lunch, I’ve been eating cowboy caviar salsa with corn chips. My rule is to not eat packaged food with more than 5 ingredients. Dinner is usually my worst meal of the day. Last night we had homemade whole wheat pizza with mushrooms.

I absolutely stay away from sugar and white flour. I rarely eat beef or pork and eat milk products even rarer. I go by a whole foods list found here <http://www.therawfoodworld.com/wholefoods.html>.
Really I eat whatever I want and as much as I want. The other day, french fries sounded so good so I ran to the store and got a sweet potato, sliced it up, sprinkled it with olive oil, pepper and salt and baked. It was sweet and crispy. It just gives me shivers thinking about it!

 Now I know the whole idea of eating as much food as you want seems counter intuitive but it works. At the beginning of my juice feast, I was 156lbs. When I ended, I had lost 5 lbs and with my lifestyle of eating, I have lost an additional 7 lbs. I am now 1 pound under my pre-pregnancy weight and still going!
Please feel free to ask any questions about my juice feast. As you can see, I love talking about it.

5 simple, everday weight loss tips

So Sunday was a pencil skirt wearing kind of a day. I was feeling good! =) Last week was a very successful week.  I felt completely in control and lost 4 pounds. Trust me, this is not a normal number nor should it be expected. Some of the weight I gained quickly from a bad weekend so I knew it was going to come off quickly.  Please don't get discouraged if you don't usually loose this much weight in a week.  On a really good week I can loose 2 pounds but that is rare.  The lower I get the harder it gets as well.  I also woke up today and had lost another pound which puts me at my lowest since last fall and that puts me 8 pounds away from my goal. 

I really feel like I can contribute my weight loss last week and this week to the changes that weight watchers made to their points plus program this year.(If you don't follow weight watchers but would like more information about it email me here. I would love to help you out with the resources I use). They recommend if you weren't loosing weight on the new points plus to try going down 3 points but no lower then 26.  I was at 29 points so the lowest I could go is 126 anyways but it has really made a difference.  If you follow weight watchers and don't know about the changes you can see a detailed description at DanicasDailys here.  It is very informative!

Being on this journey for a few years I feel like I have learned a few very basic things that have definitely contributed to my weight loss success and would like to share them with you.  Here are a few.  I will do a nother post with a few more soon.

1. Set a short term goal.  When I was 160 pounds getting down to 130 or 125 felt overwhelming.   I decided to start setting short term goals.  I always set a weekly workout goal and I always set a weekly weight loss goal. It was usually only 2 lbs per week and the lower I have gotten my goal has changed to 1.5/week but it was a number to work towards.    I also have set a goal for  events.  If I was going to be seeing family or had some sort of event I would try to figure out how much weight I could realistically loose in the amount of time till the event.  Whether it was 2 weeks or 30 days I would work towards that goal.  I always tried to make sure that my "Event" wasn't more then 1-2 months away.  More time than that seemed more long term to me. That helped me even more then my weekly goals. 

2. If you like sweets like me then Having sweet, lighter snacks around will help. If you are not a sweet eater there is probably something that is an indulgence for you so have a healthier, lighter option around. Whether it is a Fiber one bar, 100 calorie snack pack, snackwells, knowing how many WhoNu, oreo's, or keebler grasshoppers I can have for a low point sweet treat or its having a homemade low point treat around these things have SERIOUSLY helped me be successful.  I crave sweets every single day and there are days when I just cant resist so I try to have something on hand so that when the craving comes or someone around me is having something that is not low fat or low calories then I can grab the better options and don't feel the need to indulge.

3. Find a way to Get AT LEAST 8 cups of water.  When I workout I try to get even more. This is  one of the most basic of basic weight loss tips for many reasons.  For one, water is so important for our bodies but two, if I am not getting enough water I feel hungry more frequently.  I think that a good portion of people have a hard time getting all 8 cups of water so figure out what works for you.

I find that I can drink more water if I am sipping it from a straw rather then drinking it from a cup.  I found a water bottle that I really like that I can refill and sip from all day.  Keep it in a room that you go in and out of all day or else carry it around your house with you. When you see the water bottle take a big huge sip!  I also always keep a water bottle in my purse so that when I am out and about I can be drinking water too.  So figure out what works for you and stick to it because getting all your water in will seriously help you be successful.

4. Have someone to set goals with and to answer to.  Whether its your spouse, best friend, neighbor, sister, coworker or someone else find some who is trying to loose weight and is willing to report and listen to your report regularly.  Make sure it is someone who is motivated as well.  I have tried this with a few people and some people have helped me be successful and some people were just not into it enough. 

5. Work out the way you like.  If you are doing  a workout that you hate then chances are you are not going to stick to it.  I recently read a blog about a women who lost half her weight starting at 165 by walking everywhere she went.  She didn't like to run so she just walked.  Switch things up in your workout. I really enjoy working out but if I do the same thing every single day I get board.  So I switch it up every day.  My regular routine usually consists of running 3-5 miles some days and doing Jillian Michael's videos other days.  However, some days I don't feel like doing either so I pull out one of the movies I have on hand and do that instead. 

These are just a few tips and trust me I am no expert I have just found that they make a didifference for me.  I will definitely be posting some more soon.  If you have other ideas that have made a difference for your success I would love to hear them.  =)

I saw this video and I am not going to lie I wanted to cry to think about the implication of what it means to be exposed to LIES our whole lives and to think that I am raising a daugther in what can only get worse.  It makes me want to protect her from what media portraise so badly.  It also impowers me to know that what we see is not reality and I don't have to look perfect.  I also wanted to share this website with you.  Beauty redefined.  I found it empowering.